The phenomenon that is defined as "stress" has many faces. It´s symptoms, the effects on ourselves and our environment, the interactions between work and private life, so-called spillovers, are as individual as we are. Our resources and coping strategies in order to avoid or reduce the effects can differ in a wide range. There are many influencing factors that science has analyzed, e.g. personality factors such as optimism or resilience or also factors from our development and upbringing, i.e. the influence that our parents and other caregivers had and have on us and much more. For this reason, there is no ONE way to deal with stress.
For some, a red traffic light or a traffic jam on the highway triggers a rapid heartbeat, headache or feelings of restlessness, for others it is a way to calm down, turn up the music, listen to news or make calls (with hands-free system - of course ..). In many cases the problem is time pressure, which we very often expose ourselves to. We believe that we have to meet other people's expectations of us. Harmony in social relationships is an important motivating factor for this.
It is not a question of not having time, but of taking it. One way would be integrating it explicitly into our weekly schedule. Here we can outsmart ourselves. Check out your appointments for next week and look for (even small) gaps.
Next step would be thinking about what you would like to do, where you can let go of problems and stress, what will clear your head, what makes you feel comfortable? Write this down in the schedule for next week as a fixed date and look forward to it. Don't have a guilty conscience, either before, at, or after this activity. Time for ourselves is so important to recharge our batteries, to be more balanced and to feel good with ourselfs.
This positively influences the reward center in the brain and ensures that you feel comfortable and energetic. Enjoy your little breaks consciously! Perhaps you will only integrate small actions in your schedule in the first week because the week is already too busy or you feel unsure whether you are “permitted” do it. Don´t worry, start with small steps. If you do this consistently every week, you will become more and more secure and will consciously create more freedom for yourself.
Here are a few small suggestions:
- cycling to the beach / lake
- walking / hiking
- swimming, sailing, surfing, playing soccer / handball / volleyball
- Asian martial arts
- climbing / mountain hiking
- Gym
- with a good book on the couch / on the balcony / in the garden / in the park
- meet friends
- have a nice evening with your partner, your family
- shopping
- sauna / wellness
- relaxation lessons: Yoga, PMR, Autogenic Training, Breathing techniques
- short breaks / trips with the family, alone, with friends
- cinema / theater / concert / exhibitions
- stroll through the city
- have a coffee / go out for lunch or dinner
Even though some points seem banal to you, when was the last time you have done it? Honestly?
Enjoying activities that makes you feel comfortable enhances the unconscious experience of relaxing, focussing inward, deeply in- and exhaling and recharging your batteries. Therefore it is so important that you prefer activities, you love to do and have fun with. Something that brings you into the state of “Flow”.
The first step is always difficult, especially if occupation and private life leave us little time for ourselves. If you take better care of yourself and integrate regular little breaks for yourself, you can better cope with stress and problems. This also benefits your private life and your job. Listen to the inner voice and permit yourself to enjoy the activities you love. Of course this is very individual for everyone. That is the reason why it is so important to find and strengthen your own resources in order to enhance your individual coping mechanisms.
Of course, it is also important to find and reduce the other side of the stress scale, the stressors. In addition, use your own methods that can help to change and strengthen personal characteristics and strategies that are necessary for coping with your stressors and their effects.